Mommy magic, Kathleen Clarke

I saw the sign and it read, "Princess Holly".   Strange and true it was 1999 when I walked off the plane as the regional alumnae director, volunteer for Alpha Phi International sorority. Kathleen was an alumnae chapter leader for the San Jose State chapter. I'd never met her and she was hosting me in her home. I was scared nervous and unsure about the role I had accepted.  The idea of staying with a stranger was a little foreign. Soon after her name became Kat and the memory making began.

Over the years our friendship as with life has seen some pretty cool things.  I was there the first day Madeline went to school.  We've been wine tasting and outlet shopping.  Watched the girls dance at Disneyland and get every princess autograph.  Today I dream of sitting at her daughter’s graduations.   Yes, Kathleen and I will be the embarrassing ones in the front row with signs of the girls on their first day of school.

Over the years we've kept Hallmark in business with, yes snail mail cards. Cause Kathleen refuses to get on Facebook.  Have you ever wondered who sends the cards for the strange holidays, Halloween, or July 4, Kathleen and I do? 

Every woman should have a friend like Kathleen. One that is so different from you she lights the room just being in it. We have different career and mommy paths, different ideas on what is PC to say and what is not, a way different view on religion and parenting.  Kathleen, as a California girl her whole life I had to teach her coat wardrobes, and, I as an Oregon girl Kathleen teaches me about places you wear shorts year round.  When I lose my way she comes and kicks my butt back in line, reminds me who I am.

Now when the girls, Kathleen, Madeline and Gabrielle pick me up there is still a sign... Only now it says "Auntie, Holly". That's the magic of love, time, and of sisterhood, and Alpha Phi.  I am a better and changed woman every time I am in your presence Kathleen.  Thanks for being you and sharing you with me.

Can You Connect - Chemistry, Wine & Tiaras? Janet Bryant

Life, love and friendships are amazing with some friends you remember the exact moment you met and others it's you simply don't know life without them in it.  I don't recall the first time Janet and I met. I do know this, we share a friendship across miles and years I share with no other woman.  You see mathematically Janet could be my mom. Yet, I don't consider her another mother. That is a heartfelt expression.  Janet is, well Janet. My sorority sister, confident, supporter and friend the one I text message or Facebook message when I’m living it up.  Janet is a fellow of the American Chemical Society, mother, and grandmother. Her professional life far too complicated for my brain to understand.  She loves to golf and will forever be remembered for her festive attire and bold finger nail polish.

My favorite Janet memory is the day she showed me her antique jewelry collection. It is because of Janet I have a tiara.  Janet taught me every woman is a Queen. When the rough days come I'm not even afraid to admit. I even wear it around the house from time to time.

Over the years we've shared many an old school phone call, now days a Facebook IM, holiday cards. We tried to make it an annual tradition for me to come to her town for the annual wine festival.  Janet, I’ve made two years.  I know every excuse you can get to come to Portland you even come my way.

What every woman should learn from Janet.  Have friends I emphasize friends from every generation and walk of life.   I want to highlight the word friends.  Janet was there taking proud photos the day I was married, she removed them the day I was divorced.  She laughs with me on the good days, celebrates my contracts, and if I had to bet she even wears her tiara on some of the same nights I wear mine. 

Love you sis!   aoe

My first "Big Girl" Boss, Marsha Stout

March 1999, I walked into the offices of what was then called The Portland Oregon Visitors Association it was a panel job interview.  Marsha Stout, Director of Membership was the lead in the interview and little did I know two other future mentors would sit to her left and right Jackie Harper and Carolyn Wence.

Marsha took a risk on this recent college graduate. She hired me as the membership sales manager.   She was willing to see my potential as a sales person and industry professional.  Little did she know then where I would be today.

Over the years Marsha would open some of my first career doors, allowing me to attend local, regional, and national conferences. Marsha gave me my first performance reviews that helped to mold the woman I have become.  Just about a year after I started she was also willing to let me grow as she allowed me to job transfer to the Convention Services position.

Yes, it is true most every woman will have her first boss memory. Not every woman can call that woman now more than 10 years later a friend.   So as woman move through life today if you have choices to make about how roles are defined and redefined.  Marsha retired a year ago. I was moved to be able to attend this grand celebration in honor of her.

What every woman can learn from Marsha? Take time to get the right employee, hire women when appropriate.  Once you have them nurture their strengths, challenge them to grow to become the women they can be.

Perfect Professional: Cathy Mick

Perfect Professional:  Cathy Mick

Do you remember who bought you your first suit?  I do, in fact I still have it in my closet.  I kept it with the intention of giving it back to the daughter of this role model. 

Cathy not only gave me my first suit she gave me my first rolodex, day planner, and one of my first jobs.  Cathy & I met, oh geese when I was in middle school, heck maybe even elementary school.  I baby sat her first born son, Ryan.   I worked at her company and would house sit when she was away.

More than these things and opportunities she gave me, Cathy, saw things in me I couldn’t see.  Cathy saw that I had potential as a business woman, that I was organized and had a commitment to people and customer service.  The story of her giving me the rolodex is actually pretty amusing.  I think it was my 8^th grade graduation gift.  She gave me a rolodex in the day we actually used rolodexes and the book Dig Your Well Before You Are Thirsty, by Harvey McKay.  You see, my parents amazing as they are don’t exactly have the huge network of professional friends and colleagues I could tap into.  In this book you learn how to build your network and nourish the people who mean the most to you.  Since then I have recommended that book to countless other people I have mentored over the years.  Thus demonstrating again how each one of us can make a little ripple in the world.

What can other women learn from Cathy.  Sharing is caring.  I’m quite sure that the day Cathy gave me her used suit she’d have had no idea what that would mean to me and to my future.  What one little thing can you do for a woman in your life that may, just may make a difference when she turns 35?

Thank you Cathy for being an inspirational woman, wife and mother!

Going Beyond Business and the Classroom – Teresa Wood

Going Beyond Business and the Classroom – Teresa Wood

This being back to school week in Oregon this is the perfect week to post about Teresa Wood.  Teresa was my high school business teacher and advisor for the Future Business Leaders of America (FBLA) chapter; she is a dear friend, and role model.  My favorite memory is still 1993 Rose Festival when Brent Freeze and I dreamed up the wild idea that FBLA needed more exposure and we wanted to have a float in the Rose Festival Parade.  I’m sure in that moment you thought we were insane, and you let us do it anyway.  You are always the first teacher in the door and the last one to leave.  Many generations are in debited to you for your commitment.  I know I am who I am because of your zest for business, for encouraging me to compete in FBLA and go on to college.

Teresa & Warren, her husband was some of the first investors in my first company Event & Meeting Solutions, when I was a meeting and event planner.  Yes, they hired me to put on a Christmas party complete with horse drawn carriage in their neighborhood. They attended my wedding and were there for me as I cried my eyes out through divorce.

What can every woman learn from a friend like Teresa?  Release any limiting beliefs you may have about who you are and what you want to be.  Teresa with faith and fortitude has watched her job as a teacher evolve and adapt over the past 20+ years. She has seen kids come, and go.  Choosing not to be parents themselves Teresa & Warren parent all they come into contact with as role models, as caring community citizens and friends learning to navigate the journey ups and downs together.

Thank you Teresa for your early morning emails, late night text messages and mostly for reminding me that what is important is what is inside of me and not what others add.  Thank you for reminding me, that each and every day I have the chance to renew my goals and reach higher.

Always a Teacher: Amy Graves Jordan

Look up the word “teacher” and you will find this face:  Amy Graves Jordan

A sad fact in life today is we are often moving so fast that we don’t take the time to acknowledge people who literally change the direction of your life.  For me, that’s part of what this blog is about.  Taking time to tell those people what they mean to me.  How they changed my life. 

This person I don’t think I have even seen or talked to in 3-5 years.  Our lives once connected by our first high school jobs we would see each other several times a week.  Amy and I went to different high schools and worked at the same Hallmark card shop.  What memories high school such a pivotal time of choices in a person’s life.  The big questions, like, who you go to prom with, what do you do on a first date, seem huge.  The small questions like, do you go to college and where seem so trivial.  It’s only later you learn that the big questions then become small and the small questions literally set the direction for your life.

Amy always knew she would be an elementary school teacher.  If you look up the word in the dictionary I know you will find her photo there. She truly is the best of the best.  Knowing what she wanted Amy went off to school out of the area and I stayed local.  One night her mom came in to the Hallmark and asked me to call Amy.  She asked me to explore the idea of her coming back to Linfield College not too far from where we live.  I must have made that call, I don’t remember it.  All I know now is that Amy convinced me that I was “good enough” to get in to Linfield.  A college I had considered right out of high school and didn’t apply cause I knew even with my GPA I could never be accepted.  Fall of 1996, two years after high school graduation we walked on to campus together Amy an elementary education teaching major, me a business major.  We rushed Alpha Phi sorority together and walked across the stage two years later on graduation day together.  Our paths have unfolded one day, one week, and one year at a time.  I don’t see Amy as much as I would like.  I still remember the laughter and innocence of days gone by.   Thank you Amy for giving me the courage to apply to Linfield, for I know that decision catapulted other decisions that make both of us the women we are today.

What every woman should learn from a friend like Amy.  Never forget old friends.  As the song goes make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver and the other gold.  As they say in Alpha Phi, aoe, Amy!  I am so proud of you beautiful teacher and amazing mom!

A+ Friend: Amanda Smith

These are my favorite 10 days of the year, why?  Cause for only these 10 days do I get to call my best friend Amanda the “old” lady.  Not that I ever actually do, cause 10 days later I get to be old with her.   Today as I post this it is Amanda’s birthday.   Anyway, two Virgo’s being friends they say can either be a match made in heaven or a bit of a challenge.  Amanda and I have ridden many of wave, colleges, dates, marriages, divorces, dating again, jobs and who knows what is next.

One of my favorite Amanda memories is actually that of a birthday long passed.  It was middle school and my small group of friends thought it would be fun to kidnap me.  Tie me up the whole deal.  Silly kids we were.  That day afterschool they would surprise me.  Amanda’s mom would drive me around till I was totally lost and then once at the secret location celebrate with me.  After what seemed like forever on the floor of her mom’s suburban we got out and they dragged me all around the bushes, and trails.  Finally so frustrated they took off my eye cover to reveal we were at Amanda’s house.  They had cake and presents.  Although in the moment I’m pretty sure I did not love it.  Now so many years later this memory of them caring for me and wanted to celebrate with me is probably part of why I love birthdays so much.

Amanda and I have many memories and countless stories.  Many can’t be shared due to a strict cone of friendship silence.

What every woman can learn from Amanda?  Time heals all things no matter how winding the road becomes you should always have one lifelong friend.  There have been time’s I haven’t been there when Amanda needed me, and the same she would agree is true.  No matter what though women should have that person you can count on no matter what.  I’ll be honest there have been times I’ve wondered why are we friends.  Through the magic of true true girlfriend ship and wisdom of the years we always re-connect.  Perseverance in friendship that’s what every woman should have. Thank you Amanda for sharing that with me.  Here’s to many, many more birthdays, stories and memories.

Inspired or Insane: Renee Way

Inspired or Insane:  Tri-athlete, Renee Way

Women of influence come to me in every walk of my life.  Today’s featured woman is a sorority sister.  Renee Way is alumnae initiate of my sorority Alpha Phi.  That means Renee became a member after college for the personal and professional connections it provided.  I am honored to say she was initiated with my Alpha Phi pin.  Only one other woman can say that, my mom.  Renee and from that moment shared an instant connection. 

Renee is a career and college counselor demonstrating her commitment to inspire high school students they can be anything they want to be.  She demonstrates to her students how their college and career choices have to be the right thing for them and how they should never let grades, or finances stand in the way.  For Renee Way, there is always a way!

Inspired or Insane?  Here is the question, why would any person take up participating in triathlons?  Me, I have no clue.  A triathlon is something like 3 miles of swimming in open water, 26 mile bike ride and 6 miles of running.  Not only in the same day, but see who can do it the fastest.  In my mind insane, my friend, Renee way at 52 years old does this with ease, grace and love of self.  This weekend she placed first with at time of 3 hours and 2 minutes.  She is a woman who stares fear in the eye and goes forward anyway.  Renee hates the swim part and every time she puts her heart and focus on the line to overcome and endure.  I am so proud of her.

In addition Renee makes the world’s best low calorie chicken pot pie.  Let me tell you when you are having a bad dad there is nothing like Renee’s chicken pot pie to soothe the soul. 

What every woman should learn from Renee.  You are unstoppable!  When I asked Renee if she was inspired or insane she said a little bit of both.  That’s what it takes to be bold, smart, beautiful woman today.  Find what inspires you and put one arm in front of the other, one foot on the bike pedal and one step ahead and nobody can get in the way of your inspired dream.

Renee, thank you for always believing in me and my dreams, thank you for helping push me to the next step when the fear makes my road dark I am grateful beyond measure for how you insanely inspire me and countless other women.   

Buy Red Wine & Chocolate - Marina Peterson

Do you have girlfriend that you’ve known so long you don’t even remember when or how you met?  They have become so integrated into who you are that you can’t see your life without them?  Marina Peterson is a friend like that for me.  I met Marina when she married my college friend Noah Peterson.  Together, they are the kind of friends where when life gets busy months may go by where we don’t talk, and then there are weeks when we talk every day.  I know that at any time I can pick up the phone and you’ll be there.  Together Marina & Noah are Peterson Entertainment.

Marina is the woman of many, many talents from running her own company, supporting Noah in his, and from time to time doing contract work.  Marina is an HR genius.  The companies she works with are lucky to have her attention to detail and goal oriented success strategies.  A dedicated volunteer with many organizations that support the growth and development of young women, Marina is the standing President of the Portland Female Executives she has lead the organization thru countless education programs, holiday fundraisers, and member recruitment campaigns. 

When I started my company Marina and Noah were the first to call and offer support from creating flyers, videotaping my talks.  The amazing thing is I don’t even have to ask.  It’s just done.

I do believe every woman should have someone like Marina as a friend.  What every woman can learn from Marina? Take your time finding your life partner.  I know she is a demonstration it is worth it.  Have perseverance!  Marina is the most flexible and organized woman I know.  She is a lifelong learner, dedicated to giving back.  I know from experience a little time with Marina, red wine and chocolate can cure anything.  And if that day ever happens you need to come home to flowers on your doorstep.  She’ll do that too!  (No Marina, I’ll never forget that.)

Marina thank you for the laughter and the tears for the tough love we both share with each other that keep us growing into the amazing women we are meant to be!

Friendship knows no distance - Rachelle Blake Neal

Without a doubt Rachelle Blake is the friend I have known the longest on this blog. Ironically she is quite possibly the friend I see the least. Rachelle and I have been friends since 6th grade. That was the year when her family became missionaries and they began to travel the states and around the world ministering to the world as part of Wesleyan World Missions. In every way that was so foreign to me, I grew up with little religious/spiritual influence. The end of the road or across town seemed far away. I couldn’t even compute why anyone would move to Germany. Over the years we would exchange postcards and notes on an infrequent base, as trips would bring them to Oregon we would meet up.

The magic of this connection is no matter how rare or often that we see each other it’s always just like yesterday. We attended each other’s weddings and celebrate the milestones personally and professionally.

In 2001 I was able to pack my bags and go to Czech Republic where Rachelle has started the mission and school. I met the students she was working with, went grocery shopping in her store, we watched black light theater, and the symphony in the square. Rachelle took a week vacation and we took the Czech tour of Paris & Vienna by bus. Always the hostess with most-ess Rachelle was translating the Czech tour into English for me. We both still laugh to this day about her translation of the L’Arc de Triomphe in Paris.

Our most recent time together was just earlier this year. Now the Neal family Rachelle, her husband Josh, and their daughter Kayla stayed in my home. We took her husband on his first Oregon coast beach adventure. Again, always wanting to make a memory we woke up to the sound of the Tsunami warning signs the day after the big Japan Earthquake.

What every woman can learn by having a friend like Rachelle is.; conviction to God over self, commitment to love in all that you do, commitment to family no matter what that looks like, friendship can cross all time zones, all countries and every age.

God bless you Rachelle for the gift you are in my life today, tomorrow, for always.

Mompreneur and More - My Friend Janine Driver

As I made the list of 35 women I wanted to feature I found family, close friends, sorority sisters, professional friends, advisors and more. Today, the blog is about to take a new direction I want to feature a professional friend who has become a personal friend, someone that will be a surprise to many people, including her. This woman came into my life more recent than the previous two. Janine Driver President of the Body Language Institute and I met only about 2 years ago. She was the keynote speaker at the MPI (Meeting Professionals International) Cascadia conference. And, well… Janine doesn’t like it when I tell the story this way and it’s true. I didn’t like her “Boson Moxie” as they call it. I walked out of her talk actually.

Now I consider Janine a dear friend and role model. You see I was encouraged to give her a second chance. A friend told me you learn the most from the people who “push your buttons”. So I did I attended the Body Language Institute program. Two days with Janine that truly changed my life. In the class you participate in a variety of activities to learn about how you use your body language more effective and read that of other people. At the end of the two days I was more confident so confident actually I presented the winning “mock” sales presentation on Why Coke-a-Cola should provide body language training for their sales teams. Over those two days I learned to own who I was, what I wanted in life and how to demonstrate that confidence in the clothes I choose, the jewelry I wear and how I hold my body. All the things I learned were small things that combine to make a big difference. I am a better speaker, entrepreneur, and woman as a result of the experience. What I know now is everything that was "hard to take" about Janine is what I so desired and wanted for my life. To be confident, own my message and share that message with the world.

It was a gift to be able to go back to the Body Language Institute and participate in BLI 201 with Terence Noon, the producer of the Dr. Oz show. Thanks to Janine I walked into that program an unsure entrepreneur and walked out confident in my brand, my focus and what I needed to do to be successful. Janine spent one on one time with me really giving me great tips on my next steps. What I love about Janine is she uses her “Boston Moxie, to connect to the somewhat insecure girl from a trailer park.” When you work with Janine you get the real deal, flip flops, language and all.

All of this is the more public side of Janine Driver, I admire her for this and more deeply, what even she doesn’t know is I call her one of my 35 most inspiring women because of her ability to grow her business while being a mom. When you get to know Janine she is one of the most dedicated family women I know. Janine is supporting her mom through cancer while raising her angel son Angus and growing her global business.

What you should learn from my friendship with Janine, give everyone a second chance, connect to people who are different than you and women no matter what should support the growth of other woman. We are not in competition, people!! Every woman should find the role models, the mentors and the silent cheer leaders. Janine lives clear across the country from me. I may only see her once a year face to face, and a few facebook posts during the year.

Janine, thank you for giving a little lost girl from small town Oregon a chance in your program, for giving me strength beyond measure and the courage to keep reaching for my dream. To be a bit like you a mom-preneur and professional speaker/trainer. I am in debted to you for giving me that second chance. I can’t wait to be back with you at the Body Language Institute.